When you struggle with depression doing simple task’s like getting out of bed in the morning, nourishing your body with healthy foods and keeping your room clean can be some of the most difficult things to accomplish.
Once I started paying more attention to myself I noticed a pattern that despite how hard I tried and how much I gave myself talks it would still happen – I am currently here.
I finally followed through with caring for my mental health on a Professional level.
If I want to be of service for others that are going or will go through my same situations, why not care for myself so that I can do the same for them. I can not and will never expect anyone to do something I myself wouldn’t do.
When I am having good days, I question why did I even make that initial appointment or think that I may need help. But, when I am having bad days it’s like the help can’t get to me fast enough. After speaking with a psychologist about my life experiences, how being in the military has been and my current situations, she recommended that I get screened by a psychiatrist…
I know how big pharma works and how our health care system is and that wasn’t something that I wanted to hear. I have also had issues with prescription medication in the past and can proudly say that it’s been 7 years now since I’ve put anything harmful/mind alterning into my body. But because there are things that have been affecting me since I was in my early teens and situations that could’ve manipulated my chemical composition as far back as being in utero I complied, but made it known that medication isn’t my first option of treatment and will refuse unless the evidence deems it.
So until I get screened, the psychologist asked me to track my behavior/feelings for the next 10 days. It’s been a good two days so far, a lot of high energy vibration. Another human being like myself would understand and deem it vibrational harmony with the Universe, the others could perceive as if I possibly am delusional.
I’ve learned to go about my life not caring what other people think and staying true to my authentic quirky eccentric self.
I am challenging myself to be more proactive about my health and wellness habits. When I first started my yoga practice and incorporating new things into my life, I took the 21 day approach and it always worked well.
For the next 21 days I want to focus on my health and creativity; I’ll be trying to steer from processed sugars by making my own sweets and always keeping fruit on hand, getting out in nature and doing Sun Salutations and/or meditation before work, write atleast one idea about what to blog/vlog about every 3 days day – no matter how miniscule the topic, even if it’s only one sentence, remembering to drink water, editing videos for my YouTube Channel and creating goodies for Eleutheromania Handmade.
What are Mantras? A Mantra is a word or sound repeated to help you bring your focus to one particular place. Primarily, they help you concentrate during your meditation practice. Mantras originate from Hindu and Buddhist teachings.
One of the most known Mantra is the Om Mani Padme Hum Mantra.
Last week I experience a very roller coaster kind of day…
I was very motivated, happy, excited and on a roll for all the wonderful things that are and will continue to unfold in my life.
But then it just hit me… this wave of unbearing and painful sadness.
The silence became deafening, I wanted to cry but was too numb, I wanted to chug down a bottle of liquor, to reach for a pack of smokes and was just down right feeling like I was crazy. In the midst of this internal turmoil I caught a glimpse of sanity and had the coherent thought “after this amazing day, how on earth did I end up here!?”. Going from one extreme to the other at the snap of my fingers isn’t normal – not like that and definitely if nothing on the outside triggered it.
For the past year I’ve been tip toeing around the idea of seeing a psychologist to see if perhaps this will help identify whats going on. This requires digging through a lifetime of traumatic incidents and perhaps even of talking about things that I’ve never verbalized…
I know this is something that I’ll never truly be ready for, but if I don’t do it now I’m afraid certain patterns will keep popping up for the rest of my life and I wouldn’t feel comfortable giving someone advice that I can’t or don’t follow myself.
MY ULTIMATE GOAL IS TO BE AT PEACE WITH MYSELF, ELIMINATE TOXIC FEELINGS AND ELEMENTS AND ENERGIES FROM MY LIFE. UNLEARN NEGATIVE AND HARMFUL PRACTICES AND THOUGHT PATTERNS. TO STOP LOOKING FOR PEOPLE THAT DON’T LOOK FOR ME AND TO CREATE A SPACE FOR MYSELF THAT IS NURTURING FOR GROWTH SO THAT I MAY GENERATE LOVING ENERGY FOR MYSELF AND OTHERS. I WANT TO NOURISH MY SPIRIT AND BALANCE MY ENERGIES. I HAVE BIG DREAMS AND I DESIRE TO LIVE A LIFE THAT I LOVE AND BE ABLE TO RADIATE THAT LOVE #NAMASTE
I follow various instagram accounts and when I used Facebook a couple Badass Women making their rise in their own business endeavours (was even a client of one) and have learned so much. I’ve seen so many people skyrocket doing what they love simply because they believed in themselves and weren’t afraid of doing so.